I’m talking about a dime, as in perfect 10, not just worth a few cents. I’m throwing it back on this Thursday to a state I’ve learned to greatly appreciate–California. From top to bottom, east to west, I’ve only really explored a few hot spots of the Golden state. All I have are these memories pictures but I have to say that being here on the East coast has made me long for California more and more. Of course while I was there, I was finding everything wrong with it, and now it seems like there is a lot of right going on with the left side of the USA.

Let’s start from the top, in the Bay. Oakland to be exact. Yes, I always think about what my life would’ve been like if I went to USF and spent four years in the Bay. My guess is my life would be a lot different, but I am so happy with where I’ve been so far. Now with so many ties up north, I can always visit and be guaranteed a good time. One of my first trips after graduating in 2011, we roamed Berkeley and Telegraph Avenue, obviously with the desire to stop at CREAM. Ice cream + chocolate chip cookies–yeah glad I didn’t get those every week or my pants size would be a lot different too. Cookies do rule my world though.

Moving down, how can I ever forget where it all goes down, in  JTOWNNN. Japan Town in Los Angeles. Taken during one of my first trips down to JTown, Japan towns are always so quaint and quiet in wherever they might be. Things are changing, business are moving and I would love to feel like I’m in a little piece of Japan, away from Japan again. Okay fine. I really just want to eat ramen and get mochi.

Last but not least, San Diego. I remember taking this picture during one of my last few months in college. In a part of town that I really only started going to during my last year of college but should have ventured to more often. This is the North Park Post Office. As retro and vintage as it seems, it is. The streets of North Park are filled with stores that take you back to a quieter time. If it wasn’t for that GMC truck and H3 monstrosity behind it, throw this photo in black and white and you might even be fooled about when it was taken.

Leaving San Diego to go to New York was the right thing. The time came for me to close the college chapter of my SD life and change my pace. I could have seen myself living in California longer, maybe in SD, LA, or SF, and I still do. There was only so much I could do in the four years I spent there and so much more I wish to explore. I want to climb more rocks, eat more food, see historic landmarks and make more memories. So far, I’ve enjoyed what I’ve seen from top to bottom. So California, thanks for the memories, I’ll be back for more. You better believe it.

I have a temporary new home in Manhattan. Not just in Manhattan but in the West Village. Pretending to be ballin’, but really just balling when all meals are $15. Guess I’ll be eating in more often and getting getting round off #pizzanight #everynight.

With 5 weekends in a row of snow (make it 6 if the white stuff falls tomorrow), a record breaking February (coldest since 1934), and six more weeks of winter (thanks Groundhog), I feel like I’ve hit a new low (body temperature).  My nose hurts when I breath, if breathing is even possible with icy air blowing through my face. I walk with caution, everywhere looking down at every step because I don’t want to slip and fall (did that once already this winter).  I even have to add 10 minutes before I leave to go anywhere to put on those extra layers before wearing my warmest coat. WINTER BLOWS (really cold air). My friends got a new plant though so until spring decides to show up, I’ll just pretend to be in a tropical paradise.

Behind every good morning is an even better breakfast. Better breakfasts lead to even better blog posts.

I live far from the “traditional” lifestyle of work. As a freelancer, I wake up, roll out of bed and into my office (my desk), sometimes still in my pajamas. The first thing I do in the morning, after brushing my teeth, is make breakfast. Recently, I’ve been experimenting with smoothies (like this avo-kale-mango-almond milk-chia seed concoction), but a lot of times I have  greek yogurt and berries or some type of oatmeal. Growing up breakfast was just more minutes to add in to the morning routine that I would rather have spent sleeping. Now, I can’t live without it. I eat my breakfasts as I write my blog posts for matsumoto studio.

When I find it hard to design things first thing in the morning, I can easily write. Writing is like a warm-up to the rest of my day.  I look forward to morning breakfasts and blog posts. This is a routine, but with a different subject everyday, it’s never rudimentary.

Today’s Aloha Friday matsumoto studio pos, finds it way here too. A phrase that deserves a double share here because I really never want to forget it. I never realized I grew up surrounded by aloha. People in Hawaii are nice. People in New York are just sometimes not. Surrounded by strangers everyday, it’s like being in a different city all the time. You don’t often see familiar faces and you definitely don’t run into people you know very often. It’s easy to  not care. It’s easy to demand attention. It’s easy to look the other way. But that’s not aloha. Aloha is more than just flower leis and hula girls. Aloha is a way of living. You help out a friend, go the extra mile, or give up some time for yourself to practice aloha. Aloha is giving, loving and heartwarming. Aloha is how you carry yourself in the worst situations because that rubs off on others who might have it worse than you. New York City is not a place to be “Aunty Aloha” and talk and smile at strangers like how we do in Hawaii. In a world where I often still feel like a fish out of water and where the weather is a little colder than what I am used to, aloha is something that I can practice to keep me warm just like home–aloha over everything.

The technology complex is a big one. We live in a world where we never really have to “wait” for anything anymore. In fact we are doing more. Things come and go in an instant. We can upload and delete seconds later if we change our mind. We can go back in time and change history if we really wanted to–digital history. We no longer have to think about precious portraits like the ones that came from cameras like the ones above (seen at the Brooklyn Flea), because our iPhone 6 Plus with 128GB of storage can save and delete them ALL, for free. The growth of technology has changed the way we live our daily lives. I know it has changed mine. I can take pictures or videos with the touch of two buttons, then two clicks later share it out to hundreds of people. In an instant, someone hundreds and thousands of miles away from me can see what I am doing.

I love that technology keeps us so connected. Most of my friendships have continued because of technology and some have even blossomed because of it. We have a fine line to go between. The one that puts us on the side that depreciates precious moments–the real face time–we spend with people and the other side that gives us priceless moments our devices won’t capture. We also have to remember to give people a chances and hear what they have to say beyond the  blue, green and gray bubbles on our phones. Just another way technology can change things in an instant. We have a lot to think about these days; what we share, how we say it, where it goes, when we do it and all of this, we do, in an instant.

Behind Gramma Flo’s pink-lipped smile, is a one tough cookie. Recently, I’ve been thinking a lot of G-Flo. Maybe it’s because she’s been calling me from her cell phone requesting for a family photo I promised to print her a month ago.  Maybe it’s because I hear stories about her daily shenanigans from my mom and sister. Maybe it’s because I can’t believe she will be 88 years-old next month and still has the same brain and quick thinking I’ve known her to have. Mostly, I think it’s because I miss her. As bossy, headstrong, and demanding G-Flo is, she has always been loving, giving and my lifeline. She made me breakfasts, lunches, dinners, cookies, cake and jell-o too! G-Flo taught me how to fry an egg and will continue to tell me how I should be doing everything. I can probably credit G-Flo for turning me into the grandma that I sometimes am and that’s not surprise because she is, a grandma. She’s not just any grandma, she’s my grandma and I wish everyone could meet her.

The first month of the new year is over. Oy. Yeah, that happened fast. With the cue from the groundhog we also know we have six more weeks of winter. Now that’s pure evil. The island girl in me wants to cry but I will tough it out. Sorrytherestofthewordsweretoomuchbrainpowertomakeintosentences.

Juno shut down the subway and the city at 11PM as the city prepped for the worst and hopes for the best. The walk around the freshly coated city makes everything new again. There is something refreshing about seeing white everywhere. A city famous for its grit and grime, trash problems and rat neighbors, for a moment, the snow makes us forget what is underneath it all.  The snow has already brought a fresh perspective onto the lonely deserted mattress down my block making patterns I never saw before,  winds giving a chill I never felt before, and making me eat like I’ve never eaten before (I bought the food, so I should eat it). As limiting as a snowstorm sounds, there is a nice warm feeling about being stuck indoors. Your responsibilities are somewhat lifted and time stops for a little bit. The snowstorm is a pause button and it might have come at just the perfect time.

I started writing this post about the new year when it was actually the start of the new year.  Now we are closer to the next month than the start of 2015.  The past few weeks have been a whirlwind of events. From traveling from Hawaii, to California, then to New York,  juggling personal and professional life, and dealing with losses and loves, the month has set the tone for the upcoming year. More on all these things later, but first here’s what I started to say:

The new year is finally here. Two weeks deep in to 2015 and finally time to pause to write about what I hope this year will bring. I am not making any resolutions, but things I need to remind myself to do as I live out this year. They are the three B’s–Balance, Be warm, Breakdown.

I didn’t get far enough to explain what I meant by the three B’s but now I can. Although the days have passed these thougthts are still true. If anything, even more than I did when I first started writing them.

Balance: The work/life balance, the digital/analog balance, the sleep,/no sleep balance. These are a few things that have thrown me off-balance in the past. I am constantly on my computer, constantly connected to the digital world. The  phone can be so limiting to personal interaction and this year I want to make sure I am more aware of when I am guilty of this. If I ask for attention, I deserve to also give attention. I also want to be give attention to my work, but remember to play. I feel fortunate that I enjoy what I do everyday. As a designer I am challenged by new projects but I also need time to explore, wander and release. Whether it’s trips to the gym, aimless walks through the city, or chatting with friends on the phone, I need these things to let my mind breathe. I have a history of not sleeping much, or at least sleeping at odd times. I’m not as young as I was last year, and I know I don’t have many years I can do this, so I’m going to stay up late now. Not forever, just right now, while I can balance it well with the rest of my life.

Be warm: I’m guilty of sometimes being cold. I don’t mean to do it, and I don’t want to be known of it.  Growing up we were not the “warm and fuzzy” family that told each other “I love you” all the time. Honestly, when  we did, it was a lot of weird. I was the baby of family, who got picked on, constantly. As much as I took from my older brother and sister, they never had to tell me they loved me, I knew they did. I grew up knowing that the people who loved me, loved me. There was an understanding that you showed your loyalty, love and affection to each other by what you did for them.  I sometimes feel weird when people compliment me.  My response may sometimes be cold, but I need to try and be warm. I don’t just want to be warm on the receiving end, but also giving. I’m not Oprah so I’m sorry friends, you’re not getting a free prize package of my 50 favorite things, but instead I can promise I’ll be there for you as you’ll be there for me. I think I’ve finally lit the gas stove for some people (because we all know I struggle daily with that #lifewithanelectricstove) but bear with me as it goes from cold to warm.

Breakdown:  In our own ways, we build walls to protect ourselves. Barriers to entry. China built the Great Wall to stop people from coming in because why not. You build walls and fences around your house to keep the bad guys out, you build dams to direct water a certain way for a purpose. As I’ve built up my own walls to direct myself into a certain direction, protect myself from evils, and get lost in my own world, it might be time to break some of those down. In the past few years I have done so much in my barricade. I blindly moved to a new city, I went to grad school, I met so many new friends that I now can’t imagine life without.  We really started Matsumoto Studio, and we are slowly seeing our dreams become a reality. Now with so many things in place maybe some things need to be left to chance again. As hard as it was to focus and create walls, it’s time to break them down again and rebuild the pieces in a different way. Not sure what that might be, but I’m always down for some creative construction.

So as 1/12 of 2015 is slowly closing in upon us, I got 11 more months to see where the three B’s take me. Nothing is for certain and nothing is set in stone–things change daily as I open my e-mail. I hope to write more as I find balance in what I do and be warm to myself and others while breaking down the barriers I’ve made or come across in this year. I’m going to continue to do what I love and forever put trust in the process. That’s brought me here so far and there are many more miles to go.