Pools are transparent. They are crystal clear and you can see right down to the very bottom. The current never changes, there is no surprise drop off, and what you see is what you get.

People are not transparent. (Except in Inside Out, the latest and greatest from Pixar where I learned today that feelings have feelings and I could see what each character was thinking in the most colorful and cutest way possible). In real life, people can say something, but not mean it. You can’t see all the way to the bottom and sometimes it is difficult to even scratch the surface.  Honesty is sometimes a mystery. These are the people who challenge you, test you, and put you through moments that make you or even break you.

What you see might not be what you get, and in this crazy ocean we call life, you learn to deal with this over and over again. People are not like pools but that’s fine because I always liked the ocean better.

History is being rewritten and we are living to see it happen. The big concrete jungle of New York City was a lot more c-o-l-o-r-f-u-l this weekend and this is just a glimpse of what is yet to come.

Something life-changing happened every day this week. On some days, it was more than one thing a day. For some reason in the universe, it was as if life was spinning around like a top and I was dying to see when it would just stop. These are the times you need the reminder that things fall into your control and sometimes they fall out. You’re playing a game and directing yourself to a target, maybe even through a journey, looking for the answers to well, life. I know I’m no expert because I’m just learning as life goes on, but what I can do is point myself in certain directions. I have feelings and instincts. I can tell when things are right and if they might feel wrong.  I can think about the future, but really not know for certain what that means.

This week I made decisions. I made more than one decision about a variety of things. People and thoughts often considered, but mostly thinking about myself and where I want to be. What journey I want to be on and where I see myself in a year. Okay, maybe just the next couple days.

Tonight I made the decision to walk aimlessly as I got shit done from my “shit to do” list.  The journey ended up being a 5  mile roundtrip from home in the West Village, up to Midtown, and back. Of course I should have been working, or doing something else, but I was able to get out, talk on the phone, take a walk and take the time to enjoy time. I made a decision.

Oh, Orlando. Although it took 25 years, I finally made it to Orlando, Florida. All this time I’ve been only hearing and seeing things about this magical place. I didn’t quite make it to the Magic Kingdom, but I did go to Universal Studios. I was there long enough to learn Orlando summers are no joke. They are hotter and humid-er than the worst days in NYC, which are worse than the hot days in Hawaii. There aren’t any waves or ocean, (it is in the middle of the state), but there are pools and water parks (the water isn’t really cold tho), and a lot of AC (Ice box cold).

All the heat aside, this place is special. There are kids EVERYWHERE. Big ones and little ones. People are encapsulated in man-made worlds and experiences. We went from real life, to jumping into cartoon story lines, and then back to imaginary worlds all in one day. The kids’ jaws dropped and their eyes lit up with amazement. As a big kid, I enjoyed it even more because I was there with the little kids.

So after all the steps we took, the land we covered and the things we saw, while dripping in sweat, it was worth it. Even after the rain we were left with fire in the sky and colors that were like, whaaaa?? I wouldn’t call this a relaxing weekend, but it was a memorable one. The next time though, you’ll find me there when it’s not summer.

Got nothing on HAWAII shave ice.

Third grader keeping it real on this Monday with some pencil motivation. The mind of a child is fearless. At least that’s what I have learned. Being able to spend everyday with one has sent me daily reminders about what it means to live, take risks, and love.

Ping isn’t concerned about what anyone else thinks of him. He will put temporary tattoos all over his arms, wear an outfit that doesn’t match, and burst out in song at any street corner. He will do all these things with extreme confidence. He takes the risks that many adults continue to hold back from in fear of what someone else might think. Ping also loves. While love right now might only be for video games, cartoons, and his iPod, he is passionate about all these things. Ping is an open book with no walls to hide behind.  He works hard to get what he wants and does it with all his heart. When he wants something I see him try his best. Disappointment also comes across his face if he misses his goals. This mini-person has shown me what it really means to be true to yourself.

So it was fitting when I saw these words Sharpie’d onto Ping’s pencil.  He’s only nine but he’s already figured out how to give himself what he needs to motivate himself.  I know he knows what “BEASTMODE” means better than any adult I know because I see it, everyday and it never gets old.

At The Met.

At the Guggenheim.

I grew up only looking at artwork in pages of books, on computer screens, and projections in my college lectures.  There are good museums in San Diego you can also see some prized pieces of art. We went to see those. We would talk about what the meanings and “see” how these pieces made statements and made art history. What I didn’t realize was how much more I had to see. New York is a gift. New York has given me access to hundreds, if not thousands, of art that I would have only seen through pages of a text book and pictures on screen. On any given day, I can walk into world-famous museums (this weekend I walked into two), to see things people wait months, years, their whole lives to see. It can cost me as little as a subway ride and $1 to see something worth millions, sometimes even priceless. New York is a gift–the gift that keeps on giving.

Don’t be good, be great.

…even this disposable aluminum pan! I wanted to buy it just for the design, but I didn’t need it.  Sounds like someone is finally learning the difference between wanting and needing something. #growingup

I found my two-year-old thesis, and felt like it was digital buried treasure. In short, it is about my family. In long, it is about me and how everything I’ve learned and absorbed growing up, beginning in this house, has allowed me to be where I am today, far from home in New York. Removed from this safe space–the island I grew up, the homes I was raised in and the people that support me–I figured something out. I figured out that I should record my past and remember things I might have forgotten. Every story has a beginning and this is definitely mine.

Kidding. We don’t really live in those, but if it was the only option, I would take it.

In a random order these are the things that happened in May. A month that was mostly spent on Maui with family and friends over a lot of delicious food. There’s a lot to say but I will just let the photos speak for themselves. Make up your own story, sometimes that’s fun too.